I’m starting to get the trick to negotiate with Indian people after one year in Mumbai. In this case, Indian means local people who is working on any local store, market or rikishaw driver, speak Hindi as a first language (or any another local language) but not English. Honestly, nothing can procedure if you try to negotiate with them by following normal instructions which you get used to in your county.

For example, rikishaw drivers don’t like to receive big note. I take rikishaw from my flat to office and it costs 18 Rs. They never accept 100 Rs note and force me to pay with small note like 10 Rs. Normally rikishaw driver can ask another one to change or customer have to prepare small money by buying something at shop on the street. But before that, I started to insist them “I really don’t have small money.”

I give 100 Rs to rikishaw driver.

Rikishaw driver: Chota hai? (Do you have change?)
Me: Na, mera pass 100 Rs hi hai. (I have only 100 Rs)
Rikishaw driver: Lekin mera pass chota nahin hai. 20 Rs? (But I don’t have change)
Me: Aree yaar! Dek na! Is may 100 Rs hi hai! (Oh, friend! Look! only 100 Rs in this and show him my wallet)

After repeating same conversations, rikishaw driver finally gives me change. Even if they have, they can hide the truth that they actually have change. If they do so, I also use same way to them sometimes. I can lie to store clerk at payment counter that I have only 500 Rs to get change from them. Somehow, I need to have small money to avoid to use big energy to fight with people about change somewhere. I must lie where I use less energy to get change. (Normally, at mall or big shop)

I went to DOCOMO shop today to change my billing address for Internet payment since I had been informed that the bill was not reached my resisted address. I had already moved new flat when I made contract for Internet access but did not have any official proof about my new address. So I applied with my old resisted flat address. The after 2 weeks, they found my bill was not reached resisted address.  DOCOMO said I need to resist new address, otherwise, Internet connection will be cut within 48 hours. I went to the shop accordingly but I had already guessed they might force me to show them address proof from government. But it must take long time to complete registration (at least one month). I brought email copy which was sent from HR department at company, informed me a new flat address. The guy asked me to show him official document which means I rent the flat.

Store clerk: You need to prepare proof.
Me: I have only this email.
Store clerk: But you need to get it for billing address.
Me: Why? I can pay online, why do you need billing address?
Store clerk: No, you must do it.
Me: Give me specific information, from where and who I need get proof?
Store clerk: land owner or government.
Me: No way, it will take a lot of time. Impossible to make it within 48 hours.
Store clerk: Then, no option for you. The connection will be cut.
Me: What kind of service you have! You should give me another options.
Store clerk: … Do you have any bill which mentions your new address?
Me: No, I just moved new place. I have not received any yet.
Store clerk: Sorry, no option for you, madam.
Me: The flat is provided by company. It is not mine! Only company name is resisted on official document. How I can prove it?!

Little by little, I started to add small lie. Actually, my name can be resisted on document but just I did not want to make long process (Prepare individual document, go to FRRO, get sign from land owner, resist at police station, definitely it will be a month later at least) only for Internet contract. Finally, the guy agreed that I just need a letter from company and company ID card to keep Internet connection. I got name of the clerk and left the shop after 1 hour.

You may not believe but my colleague took 6 months to get Internet connection because of these paper work. Once you visit store, you can get different information every time and be asked additional document again and again. It is just waste of time to make normal process to get something. Most important thing is that how you make them accept the exception for your needs unless you are Indian. Here is this kind of place. If you are foreigner, you need to learn how to use trick with them to avoid getting too much stress from them since you may get used to normal process only in your own country.

Welcome to incredible India!